”All forms of greatness are not brought low uniquely by a fall: some there are which allow you to stoop low without falling.” There are some positions to which we aspire purely because we are expected to always show forward progress, but in retrospect, the promotion was hardly worth the trouble. And then these positions normalize and we aspire for another position with even more unbearable responsibilities, all to attain title and more wealth that you cannot really enjoy because your life has become so wrapped up in tedium. This is Tolstoy’s tale of Ivan Ilych.
We sometimes judge the people who avoid these traps as disappointments for standing still in their careers, but is this reality? Jerry Seinfeld remarked recently, when did it all become about the money? It used to be, not that many decades ago, that we all aspired to have cool, interesting jobs and figured if you had enough to live, that’s all that mattered.
It’s entirely possible that supposed mistakes are wise choices, that not becoming trapped in mazes of tedium is good, as is devoting to a craft and gaining greater confidence and expertise. Some “disappointments” are eventually seen as lucky because they’ve shaped their lives to suit them. And if others disagree, the self creators have no good reason to listen to them.